Although the days with little kids often seem long, the years fly by. What I have found to be KEY is quality time. Investing in regular quality time with each of your children separately, especially when your child gets to lead the activities, can result in them generally feeling so much more settled, less stressed, more secure, confident and more cooperative. Creating quality time with each child also tends to greatly minimize sibling rivalry. Children crave quality time with their parents because they have such a deep innate and healthy drive for that attention.
The relationship between parent and child can transform when kids are given quality time. Whining voices become calm and strong again as your child regains strength and confidence through your accepting presence. When I tell one of my kids, ok let’s have some quality time today, they are always so excited and immediately fill with enthusiasm about all the possibilities of how we could use that time, they never tire of quality time, it’s always new and exciting for them.
What’s that saying that goes something like, “giving someone your full presence is the best present you can give.“
Here are some manageable ways to spend individual time that I have found beneficial:
Taking one sibling with you when possible to run errands. This way they get to spend one on one time with you and also understand what mommy is up to when she’s out and about. This can also be a teaching experience for younger children who are often over shadowed by older siblings.
Celebrate Birthdays Individually and then get together with the entire family. A friend of mine introduced me to this approach and it works. It really helps your child feel special after all its their day. I will often take the birthday child out to do something fun One on One even if its just picking out a birthday toy.
Assign Individual Chores around the house for your kids. When you do this include one that can be done together with you. For Instance, washing the Dishes. I will often wash the dishes and my oldest child will dry them and put them away.
These are just a few that i came up with, if you have any suggestions feel free to share!